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WWE Battleground 2017 Drinking Game

Well Great Balls of Fire has come and gone and now the honeymoon phase with yours truly and the monthly drinking games are over. It is time to buckle down and get serious. It is time to go to battle…..ground. Yeah, that’s right. Battleground. Let’s see how much you lay the smack’eth down on your roody poo liver.

As usual, this game is presented as a fun way to try to predict the results of an upcoming WWE PPV. We obviously do not advocate actually playing this game due to the extreme nature of the challenge presented here. In other words, don’t try this at home.

Standard Turn Heel WWE PPV drinking game rules apply for the WWE Money in the Bank 2017 Drinking Game: If you’re playing on “Easy Mode” take a sip of beer or of a mixed drink when the game calls for it. If you’re playing on “Hardcore Mode” take a full shot of hard liquor or down an entire can/bottle of beer each time the game calls for it.

ADDITIONAL DISCLAIMER: Only partake in the consumption of adult beverages if you are of legal age in your locale! (Hi, Facebook!)

WWE Battleground 2017 Drinking Game – Kickoff Show

Well, it’s Thursday evening and I’m quite miffed that the Cruiserweight Title is set for the Kickoff Show… here are some general rules though first:

Take a shot:

If Sam Roberts is referred to as the “Last Professional Broadcaster.”

If Renee Young sounds a little spicy since the “Talking Smack” cancellation.

If Daniel Bryan joins the Kickoff desk.

If we get a drifting Erick Rowan

Every time the word “Viper”

Each time the face of Bob Orton is shown

Take 2 shots:

If any announced match gets bounced to the Kickoff

If a video package of Tamina training Lana is shown

If Chad Gable works a match

Take 3 shots:

If Talking Smack’s cancellation is brought up by anyone

Take 4 shots:

If any impromptu matches are added to the Kickoff

Down an entire bottle:

If any new fathers are revealed

 

(WWE.com)

(WWE.com)

Tye Dillinger vs. Aiden English (Kickoff Match)

Take a shot:

For each “10” chant that breaks out

If we are serenaded by Aiden English before the match

If Aiden English finishes his song

If English sports the “Starry Night” trunks

If Dillinger has the laminate “10” card with him

If Dillinger still gets a pop, even though he doesn’t get air time ever.

Take 2 shots:

If Tye Dillinger interrupts English’s song

If Dillinger loses for any reason

If any Smackdown superstars not already booked runs interference

If the match lasts more than 5 minutes

Take 3 shots:

If the match lasts more than 10 minutes

If even on PPV, this match gets the picture-in-picture treatment

Take 4 shots:

If Tye Dillinger wins a televised match in a WWE ring

Prediction: Remember the pop that Tye Dillinger received at the number 10 spot during the Royal Rumble, I do only because I was there but dear lord the “Perfect 10” has not had any help when it comes to a) getting matches on TV and b.) winning those said matches. Dillinger wins and continues the booking holding pattern.

WWE Battleground 2017 Drinking Game

Seven main show matches is more normal. I bet one get’s moved to Kickoff. Here’s some general rules:

Take a shot:

Each time the announcers mention “Battleground”

If Mojo Rawley or Zack Ryder turn on one another

Each time you see a superstars “flag”

Prepare your disappointment with 2 shots:

If Ascension or the Colon’s are shown in preparation for Fashion Files

Take 3 shots:

If this show ends early

If someone debuts

If someone returns

Take 4 shots:

If this show somehow runs past 11pm Eastern

If Cena/Rusev gets more time than Orton/Mahal

If Bob Orton is in attendance

Take 5 shots:

If “Fashion Files” is used as the time kill for the Punjabi Prison set up

Take 10 shots:

If no titles change hands tonight

(WWE.com)

(WWE.com)

Charlotte Flair vs. Becky Lynch vs. Natalya vs. Tamina vs. Lana (Five-Way Elimination Match to determine Naomi’s opponent at SummerSlam)

Take a shot:

Each time that Lana gets offense in

If Tamina and Lana enter together

Each time Lana is rag-dolled

If Lana entrance is sans dancing

Take 2 shots:

If this is the longest match of the night

If Lana scores an elimination

If Lana (with or without Tamina) enters last

Take 3 shots:

Each elimination due to a DisArmHer

Each elimination due to a Figure 8

Each elimination due to a Sharpshooter

Prediction: This match could be really good, or it could be a 15 minute catastrophe. If the match is allowed to breathe and tell individual stories instead of running eliminations right up against one another, then it could be entertaining. Expect Lana to be in the final 3. I’ve got Charlotte here but the real feud brewing will be between Flair and Becky…… again.

(WWE.com)

(WWE.com)

United States Champion AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens

Take a shot:

At each mention of Madison Square Garden

Each time “Face of America” is stated

For each countered Pump Up Powerbomb

For each Calf Crusher attempt

If both competitors come out in Red,White and Blue gear

Take 2 shots:

Each time Owens banters AJ

Each time Owens banters the crowd

…if that backfires

If Owens eats a Styles Clash

Take 3 shots:

If AJ wins clean and this match could have easily just not happened

If Owens reclaims clean and the MSG match was just a vehicle to shake-up story

Take 4 shots:

If AJ wins via Phenomenal Forearm

If the match ends in a DQ

Take 5 shots:

If Owens wears Butterbean-style American flag shorts

Prediction: This match has been in the wash for almost 10 days now after the surprising title change at Madison Square Garden. Now this match is just the televised version of that match but don’t expect the title to change hands. The Open Challenge is going to be too good with AJ to take the belt now.

(WWE.com)

(WWE.com)

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Baron Corbin

Take a shot:

If the match starts

Each Nakamura chant

If Corbin runs in on Nakamura’s entrance

If Nakamura runs in on Corbin’s entrance

Take 2 shots:

If Nakamura eats a End of Days

Each time Mr. Money in the Bank is stated

If the match goes 5 minutes

If it is a quick Kinshasa squash

Take 3 shots:

Each Deep Six on the floor

Take 4 shots:

If this match does not start

Take 10 shots:

If Nakamura challenges Corbin for the briefcase and Baron accepts

Prediction: This match may not even get off the ground, but if it does, the booking for it is going to be curious. Protect your next great superstar or protect your Money In The Bank holder. Those variable in play, this match never officially starts. Corbin stands tall for now.

(WWE.com)

(WWE.com)

SmackDown Tag Team Champions The Usos vs. The New Day

Take a shot:

If Walé is shown

If you hear “Ja-fakin”

If Total Divas is referenced

If Xavier wrestles this match

If the Uso’s wear anything other than black

Take 4 shots:

If the New Day prevails

Take 5 shots:

If the Uso’s retain and literally have no one else in the division to take on

Take 6 shots:

If any rapping happens during the match

Prediction: The Uso’s have had a stellar run with the Blue Brand Tag belts but they have run their course through the division and the division needs a jumpstart going into Summerslam. This should be a good match with solid tag team work but the New Day takes over the division and positivity will reign once again.

(WWE.com)

(WWE.com)

John Cena vs. Rusev (Flag Match)

Take a shot:

If Cena carries the flag to the ring Duggan style

If Rusev wears his Bulgarian color trunks and not his Russians

If Cena still gets booed more than cheered in a patriotic type match

For any pop Rusev receives

If Cena wins the match

Take 2 shots:

If Rusev runs in on Cena and beats him with the flag

If Rusev doesn’t carry his flag to the ring

If commentary refers to the match as “on-a-pole”

If Cena wears Jorts

Take 3 shots:

If new Women’s no. 1 contender Lana joins RuRu to the ring

If Rusev beats Cena down to unleash super Cena *eye-roll*

Take 4 shots:

Rusev wins the match……

And is cheered

Prediction: This match should be entertaining but we know how this movie ends right? This is a patriotic, archaic storyline type match and Cena has to go over in this situation. It just wouldn’t make any sense based upon WWE history. Now if Rusev does win…. we may have a new legit title contender.

(WWE.com)(WWE.com)

Breezango prepare to close the case at WWE Battleground

Take a shot:

If this edition is Andy Griffith inspired

If this edition is NYPD Blue inspired

If they repeat a police procedural already used.

If the Colons or Ascension are the culprits

Take 2 shots:

If any physical confrontation occurs

If Breezango are referred to as “Nerds”

If Breezango are blindsided

If this is more interesting than some matches on the card

Take 3 shots:

If this goes more than 5 minutes

If Tyler Breeze is in drag

If the culprit is announced for Talking Smack

If the confrontation goes out to the ring area

Take 4 shots:

The Club are the culprits

Prediction: I’m hoping it’s the club, but it’ll probably Rowan and Harper with our luck.

(WWE.com)

(WWE.com)

WWE Champion Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton (Punjabi Prison Match)

Take a shot:

Each vein you see on Jinder

If the Singh Brothers climb in.

If Orton wins the match and kills all momentum

Each RKO attempt

Clear the liquor cabinet:

And still…….

Prediction: Jinder has to win this. Randy has been doing a great job of legitimizing him so it would be off-base to stop the momentum now. Jinder wins by hook or by crook but I think this is the match that he does it on his own.

Well, that’s our WWE Battleground 2017 Drinking Game. Hopefully, you can pace yourselves. No live tweeting this time unfortunately, but for those interested in #BattlegroundAfterDark, join me on Twitter @GrahamCoffelt, at 9pm pst and we can dissect from there. Let’s go to battle.

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